Redefining The “Strong Black Woman” Dynamics

If you glance in Webster’s dictionary, the term strong is defined as the capacity for exertion or endurance. When you state that someone is strong, it is often received as a proud statement or a compliment; however, over the last couple of years, African American women are choosing to redefine their strength.

When I was growing up my mom always would say that she was raising me to be a strong black woman and I didn’t realize later in my life I would loathe the term of “being a strong black woman”. As I begin to grow into my womanhood I embrace being a strong black woman and it became a badge of honor. Friends and family would be in awe of how strong I was when I went through traumatic challenges in my life. But it became a strain to carry the weight when everyone depended on me to be this superwoman. I became angry and hurt because I wasn’t asked about my well-being. I felt like people assumed I was doing well because I held on to being “a strong black woman.”

In 2018 after hitting burnout, I decided to slowly unravel the strong woman persona and release myself from the superwoman black girl syndrome. While saving everyone else, I didn’t realize I needed to save myself. Now in this new revolution of women taking back their power, making their voices heard, and standing up for their rights, we are redefining terms that have crippled our growth to become limitless.

Below are a couple of ways you can redefine the strong black woman dynamics:

  1. Ask For Help. If you need help, reach out to someone. Needing help doesn’t mean you are weak, but it means you are brave enough to trust someone with your vulnerability.
  2. You don’t have to be the strong one. If you are the only person in your group where everyone comes to you for strength, then find another circle. However, if you find that you like being the person everyone depends on, there may be deeper issues where seeking therapy is necessary. 
  3. It’s okay to say you don’t know. People may identify you as a strong black woman because you seem to be the expert on everyone’s problems. It is okay to tell others that you don’t have the answer and for them to seek professional advice or help for their issues.
  4. Create a new narrative about “the strong black woman.” It is up to us to create new stories about a black women. 
  5. Representation. You are your best representative as a person so make sure you are expressing yourself the way you want others to see you. (Think of adjectives beyond strong to describe yourself). 

5 Simple Ways To Create Your Life Mantra

Mantras are defined as reaffirming  words that have the power to define and shape your life. Mantras are the puzzle pieces that glue your life together. I believe mantras can help you speak into existence the life you desire to live. Regular quotes we recite on a daily basis can become our mantras in life. This month I decided to create a personal life mantra to stay focus on the life I want to cultivate. It has been a great experience for me because when I have down days I remember my mantra, Live, Laugh, Love. I wanted to live more, laugh more & love more in 2015. Below are simple ways to create a mantra that can give your life a boost to flow in the right direction.
Tips To Create Your Life Mantra
1. Favorite Quotes. Think of your favorite quote and underline the words that stick out to you. Then try to connect a mantra that fits the life you want to create.
2. Words are powerful. Words have the power to create, transform or destroy our lives. It is important to speak positive life giving words instead of words that can create the life we do not desire. Take inventory of all the negative words you say and replace them with positive words.
3. Research. Research key phrases that pinpoint the journey you are currently on in your life.
4. Simplicity. Make sure your mantra is something that is effective and you can remember it. Keep it simple and sweet.
5. Write it down, Recite & Repeat. In order to keep your life mantra present it will be important to write it down and stick it in a visible place you can recite everyday.
These are five simple steps to help you create a life mantra that will keep you inspired, centered and focused on your journey ahead!