Wrapping up 2021: Lessons Learned

Access the podcast episode here: https://tinyurl.com/6xbjkm7d

Here are a couple lessons that I learned at the end of 2021:

1. Growth is not perfection. Growth can be chaotic, messy & beautiful all at the same time, however, it is an individual choice to observe how the growing pains made you a better person.
2. Don’t Take Other People Actions Personal. When you understand trying to control other’s is impossible, you find peace in letting them be who they are without judgment.
3. New Beginnings Are Relevant.
   You can’t resurrect the past, but you can learn from it & create newer, richer experiences. So say goodbye to the old & welcome in the new.
4. Happiness is a personal priority.
   Making your happiness a priority should be a priority. It is important not to outsource this responsibility to others.
5. Settling is not an option.
   You don’t have to tolerate anything; it’s okay to say this is not for me and move on accordingly.

Why Being Basic Won’t Do…

The Corona Virus issue has made us feel so many emotions with the ebb and flow of uncertainty; staying at home has become the new normal. This new normal has caused America to put everything on pause where being still is the cure. Many schools have closed around the world, people are now working from home, and some people no longer have a job. Although it can seem to be an uncomfortable time for the world, confronted with the reality that this is the time to let go of things no longer serve our lives.

In America, we are taught that being busy and living life on auto-pilot is acceptable. We choose to operate in a world encumber with a fast-food mentality, a microwave vision for our lives. The self-quarantine gives everyone a chance to slow down, saunter, and come to a shimmer. We no longer can follow the crowd but is challenged to do something different. I believe in this time of  the shutdown, we will not go back to normal.

This transformation will cause us to become a better version of our self. We can start by self-reflecting in every area of our lives. For me, it has taught me the valuable lesson of living in the present moment.

People’s lives are being transformed because we are now finding our passion, spending time with family, connecting with friends, and doing things we were too busy to do. When the curtain rises off this center stage play we call COVID-19, how will we move forward? Will everyone go back to being “basic” or will we embrace our new normal?

Below are three ways we can release ourselves from the “basic life” to the “extraordinary life.”

1. Write The Vision. While being at home, this is a perfect time to write a plan for yourself to make some changes in your life. (Ex: If you decide to start your business now is the time to create your website, draft a business plan, etc.)

2. Execute. There is no time like the present to start being intention by putting action in your new life. Use this time to start capitalizing on not being at work. (Ex: If you are working from home, let your paycheck build up, so when all this comes to an end, you will have enough saved to live your job.)

3. Live. Before the Corona Virus, many of us were going through the motions of life; however, with the shutdown of social events and going out; we will be more present in our lives. We will have more fun living life versus existing in it.

In the end, I am optimistic the self-quarantine will bring out a better America, where we are healing, there is more joy, peace, kindness & love to spread!

 

3 Simple Ways to Make 2019 Your Best Year…

With the excitement of a new year comes resolutions, goals, and everything under the sun to make 2019 your best year. However, I have three simple ways you can make 2019 a year of ease.

Step 1: Mind Your Own Business.

Life is so much easier when you learn to focus on your own life and tune into the present moment. When you focus on fine-tuning your life, you will find no time to be worried about what others are doing including obsessing on what other people are posting on social media. You will be able to accomplish your goals quicker and see the beauty in your life.

Step 2: Stay on Energy Saving Mode…

So often we are exhausted and burnt out from fighting battles that are not our fight. We spend too much energy overthinking, fearing and obsessing over things that create distress.  We feel the need to give our opinion to every situation just to be consumed with other’s problems. When you preserve your power for the essential things in your life, you will be at peace. Exhaustion, stress, worry, and anxiety will slowly drift aside when you put your emotions on energy saving mode.

Step 3: Don’t Join The Circus….

Every clown or court jester that begs for your attention does not need to be entertain. Two thousand nineteen is not the year to sign up for anyone’s circus of foolery be adamant about setting boundaries and ignoring the distraction. To live your best life in 2019, you will have to learn the power of ignoring things that don’t require your attention.

Comment below and tell me, which step you will focus on this month to make 2019 your best year? 

The End of An Era……

Wow, I can’t believe next week Sunday is my birthday. My 30’s journey has been a beautiful evolution of “self”. I have been able to spend the years of my thirties facing issues of my past, closing the door to my past, making intentional changes to my life and most of all becoming the woman I desire to be.

As a single mom I have endured many hardships and personal setbacks but my 30’s have been my years of reflection, refreshing, starting over again and creating the life I desire.

I have become comfortable in my own skin. I love the woman I have evolved into at this point in my life. However, I know the journey is a continuous process. I am excited about my future ahead.

Since, I am commemorating the last year of my 30’s, I am sharing 39 lessons with you I learned during my 30’s journey.

Here are the 39 lessons I learned in my 30’s:
1. Confidence. Confidence is something that starts within & it is something you work on everyday.
2. No validation needed. You are grown,stop asking for permission.
3. No is a complete sentence. Stop explaining yourself.
4. Mind your own business. It never matters what others are doing. Stay focused on your life.
5. No deprivation. Stop depriving yourself of the things you love & desire.
6. Know Your Worth. You have to know your worth to know what you deserve then you will stop giving discounts to people who undermine your quality.
7. Self-care is important. Self-care is about preservation. You have to put it into practice for all areas of your life (mental, emotional, financial, physical & spiritual).
8. Trust God. 
9. Get out your own way.
10. Ask for help.
11. Be gentle with yourself you are doing the best you can.
12. Stop procrastinating.
13. Do it afraid.
14. Get out your comfort zone.
15. Be your own best friend.
16. Speak up. You have a voice use it.
17. Stop chasing. You don’t have to chase a man, friends, people or dreams. All the things meant for you will come at the right time.
18. Travel somewhere new. 
19. Date yourself.
20. Believe in yourself.
21. Do what is best for you.
22. Be unapologetic about your greatness.
22. Set boundaries.
23. Spend time with those that celebrate you not tolerate you.
24. Celebrate yourself.
25. Be patience.
26. Saunter through life.
27. Let things flow.
28. Detach yourself from the outcome.
29. Stop the comparison. When you learn to value your life you will feel no need to compare your life to others.
30. Have faith.
31. Smile often, Laugh more.
32. Have fun. Include more bliss, pleasure & enjoyment in your life.
33. Be ok with not being ok.
34. Be vulnerable.
35. Live life. Don’t just exist live your life alive.
36. Reinvent yourself.
37. Reflect.
38. Pursue your dreams. No matter how old you are you can always pursue the things you desire.
39. Be limitless. Don’t put limitations on your life.

5 Reasons Why You Are Settling!

I believe there has been times in your life where you settled for less. Settling in any area of your life can be detrimental to your growth. Settling is synonymous to mediocrity and will keep you in a state of stagnancy.

When you begin to gain clarity in your life you will begin to raise the bar. But first it is important that you become  aware of why you have settled for less. Below are five reasons to help you understand why you are settling for less in your life .

1) Fear. Many times we settle for less because of fear. We fear the unknown so we choose to stay in our comfort zone. However, nothing extraordinary ever grows from a comfort zone. So, it is important to let the fear go and launch out into the unknown. Life happens outside your comfort zone.

2) Uncertainty. Another reason we settle for less than we deserve is because we are unsure about what we want. If you are struggling with knowing what you want in your life it may be time to explore life. Exploring life will help you discover the things you may want in your life. When you go through a period of self-discovery it will expose you to the world. Each life experience we help you gain clarity on the  life you truly want to live.

3) Impatience. When you are impatient it can make you miss out on your greatest life. Many people settle for less because they are too impatient to wait for what they really want in life. When you wait patiently for what you really want you alleviate  unnecessary stress. So, wait patiently for what you want!

4) Not Knowing Your Worth. If you do not know your worth you will settle for the wrong things. If you do not spend time to build your self-worth, self-love, self-confidence and self-esteem you will discount your worth. I have learned in my life that people will treat you how you treat yourself. It is important to nurture love and confidence within yourself so you can recognize your worth.

5) Mediocrity. The last reason we settle in life because we become okay with mediocrity. We become comfortable with just existing instead of living a life to our fullest potential. Mediocrity keeps you stagnant and it creates procrastination.  You will never be fulfilled with a mediocre life. So, let go of mediocrity so you can grab hold to an extraordinary life.

Action Tip: This week take some time to focus on how you can stop settling in your life by putting one of the five reasons into practice.

In the comments below share with me the reasons you have settled for less in your life. 

Recap of May Blog Post

As May begins to disappear we are recapping the things we discussed this month. Our May series was Loss, Live & Love where we discussed how losing something or someone gives us a better perspective on gaining a valuable lesson. We also discussed how important it is to find rekindle your passion and live in your purpose.

Below are the links to recap each article:

Lose To Win!
http://www.theinspirationalcorner.net/2016/05/lose-to-win.html 

Romancing The Stone of Your Life
http://www.theinspirationalcorner.net/2016/05/romancing-stone-of-your-life.html

Unlock The Door To Happiness

Everyone wants to be happy but yet they find themselves aimlessly looking for their happiness. Happiness is not attached to a specific person, place or thing but lasting happiness is an everyday choice that has to be made in spite of external circumstances. Every person has their own specific definition of what happiness resembles for their life.

This year, I have started to search deeper into what makes me happy. It is my goal to continue to do what makes me happy and subtract myself from people, environments and things that drain my happiness. As we constantly grow as human beings our idea of what make us happy will gradually shift. I am no longer fearful of pursuing my life happiness. I realize that being happy is an essential part of living a fulfilling life.

Once you identify a clearer picture of your life happy plan then you can reevaluate where you are going right or wrong in the path to happy. I am a firm believer that everyone deserves to live a life full of colorful possibilities. People who fear living a life true to their happiness will always fall into a cycle of insanity.

Below are a few tips to help you unlock the door to your happiness on your terms!

Tip #1: Define your life happiness. Everyone has their own visual perception of what life they desire to live. Make sure you visualize the life you desire and then take time to define your life happiness. For example my life happiness consists of freedom, working on my own terms, traveling and living in a place where I can grow in my creative nature & prosper in all areas of my life.

Tip#2: Reevaluate your environment: Your environment plays a major role in how your happiness will be destructive or constructive. If your environment is draining your happiness factor it may be time to relocate.

Tip#3: Reevaluate the people: In your happiness journey you have to be willing to subtract people who put strain or stress on your positive development. It is not meant to allow everyone in your space. When you subtract relationships that are not conducive to your growth it helps you move in the direction of happiness quicker.

Tip#4: Exist outside your comfort zone: Nothing great can ever be developed in your comfort zone. Be willing to take chances and risk to stretch yourself. You never know what could make you happy if you are never willing to give it a try.

Tip 5# Take back your key & open the door. Do not let anyone disturb your peace or steal your joy. When you allow others indirect or direct behaviors influence your happiness you subconsciously give them the key. Your life happiness should not be contingent on what people do or do not do for you. 

Be bold enough to take back the key & unlock the door to your happiness!

Live In The Moment

Life is a constant rollercoaster where we are on fast forward but sometimes we need to put our lives on pause, rewind to the moments we constantly rush through and just slow down. Life is so precious in which we have to learn to embrace each moment because it will dissipate quickly. Life is about making each hour, minute and second count to create a life full of memorable things to look back on in years to come. I have been guilty in not cherishing the moment but rushing to get to the next day just to rush through it all over again however, this year I have been challenged to enjoy life in its present state and appreciate what each moment has to offer as well as teach me. For the last 190 days, I  worked a job I  did not enjoy with a person that made the job more challenging than it had to be but it taught me to never waste another day living in a moment that does not bring me joy. This job gave me the strength to reevaluate myself and my life to the capacity of investing in moments that are worth enjoying. In the real world, some moments can be painful just like the 190 days I had endured at my job however, there were moments that taught me how to let go of the bad things and create the life I love to wake up to everyday. Moments have full of lessons to go along with them even in the most uncomfortable moments. We still must strive to embrace the moment, live in it and make it a moment worth living for because life comes and goes in a flash. I have learned to capture the sweet things in bittersweet moments, hold on to the fun moments and make memorable thoughts of moments that have took my breathe away. It is funny how ugly moments teach you great lessons just like my job did for the last 190 days. I am thankful that my job ends this week as I take the time to reflect, slow down and move forward at my own pace this time. Too often, we rush because we feel rushed to be at a certain place in our life but in reality we are right where we need to be. Living in the moment is simply about not rushing out of the current moment you are in but savoring the moment. I made a vow to myself no longer to rush from moment to moment but let each moment have its place to flourish and process into something beautiful. So I challenge you this week to embrace the moment, slow down, let each moment be processed thoroughly so that maturity can have its time to spring forth. I dare you to Live In The Moment! 

5 Lessons Learned Through Life, Love & Friendship!

As the year comes to an end I reflect on how much has happen this year in my life. I realize all the things have worked out for the better even when I had no concept of why they happen. I learned valuable lessons from growing in life, loving myself unconditionally and redefining the word friend after a 14 year friendship ended. All of these things made me stronger, wiser and better. Each high and low point in my life challenged me to reevaluate myself, work on my personal issues and move forward. In 2012  I have learned to stop reminiscing on the past, holding on to pain and understand the power of forgiveness. I want to share with you five powerful lessons I have learned on my new journey as I embrace the new me…New Faces, Places & Spaces!

Lessons Learned on Love…

1) Love Yourself First (Unconditionally flaws and all), Forgive Yourself and Heal Yourself
Love is powerful but if you do not know how to love yourself you can never reciprocate that love to someone else totally. This year I have learned to immerse myself into loving myself in all areas of my life mentally, emotionally, physically and financially. I have been challenged to take time to get to know what I want, what I like and accomplishing my goals. The most powerful lesson I learned was to stop putting myself on the back burner and learning to put myself on the front row. I found out I deserve the best of everything because I believe in my ability to go farther than I could imagine. I had to realize the only limitation that was holding me back was my mindset and the words I spoke about my life. I know now I am powerful beyond measure and only want to attract those who are positive and moving forward in great strides. 

2) Love Will Find You….
After exiting a four year relationship with a man that was not the one for me I realized love will find you & you do not have to be desperate to find it. The ending of this relationship help me begin my authentic journey helping me understand the reason I attracted the same type of men. It had nothing to do with them but it was me who had to deal with my own inner issues. I have been on my authentic journey for almost 2 yrs now and it has been a great journey. I feel refreshed, renewed and reborn. I can truly say I am a new me and have a new found love for myself. I understand the importance of self love, enjoying being single and creating the life I desire….I have an new attitude about living life which is…I am living life and not waiting to have a man or get married to live life to the fullest!

Lessons Learned on Life

 3) Life is what you create it to be…..
I use to complain and hate where I lived but now I realize you have to make the best out of where you are at. If you are staying in your triangle then your life will remain boring and lifeless. I started to venture out my comfort zone and began to meet new people. I know where I am at is not my permanent place but I might as well have fun living here. Since I have ventured out I have fell in love with so many hidden treasures in the city I live in. It has challenged me to go far and beyond my comfort zone. I am having fun!

Lessons Learned From Friendships….

4) If They Walk Away Let Them Go And Close The Door….
The hardest lesson I learned in 2012 is when you start to change so does the people in your life. I had a 14 year friendship that ended it hurt me to the core but I realized the friendship was no longer the same. Both of us had changed from life circumstances and we were no longer the 19 or 20 yr old girls. We both grew into grown women who had baggage from life that needed to be dumped out. The greatest lesson I learned hurt people hurt people. When two people are wounded there is no way they can help each other. I had to understand where I went wrong with the friendship but in the end I had to let go of the pain and forgive myself in spite of the other party departure. There may have never been a full explanation but just a unfriend button from Facebook but I knew in my heart our life path was taking on different directions. I am learning to be comfortable with people rotating out of my life because we all have a destination to get to in life. As we grow and evolve our circle will also grow and evolve. Forgive, Love & Move Forward!

5) Tolerate and Celebrate….
If you have a friend who is never really happy for your accomplishments and constantly try to degrade you then nine times out of ten this person is jealous. You want to be around people who celebrate you not tolerate you. When you begin to shine then you truly see who really is supporting you. I have learned to reevaluate all my friendships and reposition some friends in my life. I am learning to get to know people for who they really are by discerning their actions, what they say and how they react. I am more open to letting friendships go if they are not mutually beneficial. I realize each friend is for different things in my life but that does not mean they will always be there. Some will stay for a season then when there time is done they will exit the stage. I have came to accept that life is about forward movement and you cannot live in the past but embrace the future head on. In order to get where you are going you have to surround yourself around like-minded people. Positive people are attracted by positive people.

2013 is all about FORWARD MOVEMENT for me, no looking back but forgiving and closing the doors to the past of 2012 and embracing 2013 with newer expectations!

Data Dump:Mental Detox 101 (10 Lessons Learned)

I think therefore I am. ~Rene Descartes~

Recently I decided to do a 10 day mental detox, I had no idea how the journey would go but I knew my end result would be self fulfilling and rewarding. I planned to be in total solitary confinement with no music, only business related phone conversations, no TV, no social media, prayer, meditation & reading positive or inspirational literature. I learned alot about the power of self-love, self-appreciation, dumping out the negative things in my mental thought process, speaking affirmations over my life and being unapologetic about loving myself unconditionally. Below are 10 important lessons I learned about myself and about my mental capacity.

Here are 10 lessons from my mental detox 101:

1)   Dump The Data. The first day I spent time writing down all my self defeating thoughts. So I begin to pour those negative thoughts, concepts and ideas on paper. I purge myself of all the negative things I thought about my future, my goals and about myself.

2) Refresh. I decide to let the negative thoughts go the second day and I hit refresh on my brain. It was time for my computerized mentality to have a blank motherboard. It was time for new data, installing new R.A.M (Random Access To New Memory).

3) Power of Appreciation.  I realized how much I was starving the appreciation I needed to have for myself. I was constantly waiting for friends and insignificant people to appreciate me but I realize I needed to appreciate myself first. It made me realize how special my gift, talent, skill is to the world and I should not give it away for free. It helped me understand to do special things for myself by myself. Those special events & places I deserve to be the first person to experience them alone (my own personal joys). 

4) Power of Investment. If I don’t invest in my greatness how can I attract sowers to sow into my greatness. I am committed to always investing in myself for self improvement mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. No more limitations!

5) Self Love Movement: Self love is a powerful love. Until love is oozing from my pores, this self love journey will never end. Loving myself unconditionally unapologetically! 

6) Purify Me. Stop entertaining negative, toxic things that will easily imprint into my brain. I have to stay mentally clean!

7) Hit Delete. Some mental disruptions are insignificant to  put your  focus on, so weed out the weeds killing your seeds of growth.

8) Let It Flow. Surrounded by so much positivity helped me attract other positive forces like a magnet. When you are mentally positive, positive words flow easily. 

9) Be Fearless. There is no more room for fear I was reminded how being fearless is apart of my physical makeup. I lived in different countries by myself while stationed in the military where fear was never apart of life. I realized how being comfortable is boring, its time to live life on edge again. Adrenaline Rush!

10) Shaking It Up. Shaking up your world with “new” things provokes a change in your mind. It opens your mind to new exciting things. It will help your creativity flow. 

P.S. My mental detox is something I can not afford to do but it is something I committed to do for every month. The first three days of every month I will be in solitary mental confinement. 

So, now I challenge you to take time to do your own Data Dump!