Don’t Be Scared To Begin

Access the podcast episode here: https://tinyurl.com/yj3eddp8

Every journey begins with taking a small step toward starting on a path to where you want to go. In each stage, you accept the thoughts of fear, failure, and fraud, making you feel like running in the opposite direction; however, if you never begin, you will never know how amazing your life will become.

When I decided to start my entrepreneur journey as a writer, I was full of uncertainty and didn’t know how everything would work out. And to be honest, I am still wondering how everything will unfold, but in this journey of surrender, I realize life is a daring adventure. Helen Keller said it best, life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.

So when will you cast away the fear, let go of the idea of failure, and dive into a life you have always dreamed of? 

The greatest failure is never being bold enough to start and wishing you would have started. My writing has helped me explore so many different elements of myself. I went from writing poetry, articles for online magazines, blogging, and becoming an author of multiple books. 

As a writer, living my lifelong dream opened up so many doors for me, attending a writing workshop in Paris, France, in 2014. Paris changed the way I viewed myself as a writer and creative soul. My writing was resurrected with vibrance, passion, and soul after arriving back in the U.S.

I want you to understand how vital it is to leap into the life you desire because fear, failure, and feeling fraudulent will always be there. 

Below I want to give you three ways to let the fear reside; understand not starting is the only failure, and the actual fraudulence is not doing what your soul was called to do.

  1. Start with Intention. You don’t have to have it all figured out, but if you set a goal & carry it out you will land right among the stars.
  2. We are all trying to figure it out. No one in life really knows what they are doing, so be okay with the fact that being perfect is unrealistic, but making progress is vital.
  3. Failure will always be an option. If you never fail, how will you grow, learn and become better in life? The thing I am learning is the only failure is never starting, so just begin

The Importance of Reinventing Yourself…

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In the last three months I can truly say I have been on an inner personal journey . I am learning how to face my fears, be vulnerable and communicate in an authentic way. Nonetheless, each journey has introduced me to a different me. I am evolving out of my cocoon and flourishing into a beautiful butterfly. I know as I evolve reinvention becomes an important part of the journey. Reinvention is the key to growth in life.

If you think about it companies are always reinventing their brands to appeal to different demographics. Companies take time to reassess what has worked for their brand and what has not worked for them. Just like a company, we should always reassess ourselves to see what methods in our lives are working and which ones need to be eliminated. Reinvention is the answer to transforming our lives into something new.

Below I will share three concepts on why reinventing yourself is so important.

1) Pain changes you. When we endure a tragedy in our lives it has the power to change us. I remember in 2007 when my two-year old daughter died it changed my life forever.  The power of losing a loved one changed my perspective on life. Pain causes you to step back, assess your lose and recreate a better you.

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2) Starting Over. Sometimes it is hard to start over but starting over gives you a new outlook on life. It opens you up to many possibilities of living a life of adventure.

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3) Nothing grows from a comfort zone. If you find yourself frustrated, irritated or annoyed nine times out of ten you are outgrowing the space you occupy. Many people allow fear to keep them hostage to their comfort zone. The biggest thing I have learned is that comfort zones are great but nothing phenomenal or extraordinary grows out of them.

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Pain, starting over and escaping your comfort zone are essential things that help you reinvent your life. Reinventing yourself is important so it can unlock extraordinary things. So today, I challenge you to evolve past the norm and be intentional about reinventing an area of your life that seems stagnant. Once you begin the process you will  see life from a different perspective!

A Seat At The Table…

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In a world full of people pleasers it is refreshing to be yourself. When you choose to be yourself magic happens in your life. You no longer settle for mediocrity but you embrace the extraordinary. It will ignite a spark in you to do life in a different way.

Fireworks are created when you no longer follow the crowd but decide to become the life of your own party. When you choose to walk in your power everyone will not accept you. However, learning to be you bravely takes courage.

In this journey you will understand that everyone will not get an invitation to the party of your life. The people you use to entertain will no longer get a seat to the table. You will  gravitate towards people who empower, inspire and encourage you. They will be the ones who become your tribe because you deserve a life filled with those celebrating your existence.

So, today I encourage you to reevaluate the people you have seating at the table of your life. Ask yourself this, “Is this person celebrating me or tolerating me?” You deserve the support, love and joy you give freely to everyone else.

 

Would love to hear your thoughts so chime in below!

 

Be Brave.


Mediocrity does not fit you well. It is the enemy of your comfortable life and mind. You have gifts, skills and abilities to change the world but you fear rejection, lack of provision and wonder if you are good enough. While you allow mediocrity to keep you in your comfort zone you are missing out on how extraordinary your life can really be. So, it’s time to let go of mediocrity and get out of your own way. It’s time to become GREATNESS!

How often does being mediocre stop you from being the greatness you were born to be? I understand you wonder if what you really want to do can financially provide for all your human needs. You question yourself and wonder can you really be successful in following your passion and purpose. All, I can say is that I have recently been faced with these plaguing thoughts about being a full-time writer.

A couple of weeks ago I had one of my good friends tell me that I was in my own way of succeeding. She let me know that the gift I had was God sent and I needed to pursue it. She further explained how I was choosing what was easy due to fear of me being rejected and not believing in my own greatness. So, all I could do is listen to her and agree because her words were just the motivation I needed to believe in myself.

After leaving the military my career life took me down a path of self-discovery. I discovered that I wanted to get back to the love of writing and pursue it as a full-time career. I no longer wanted to dream about being a full-time writer but I wanted to live this dream. Since I was a child it was always my dream to write and travel around the world.

At a young age I wrote endless, short stories, poems, plays, songs and more. Writing is not only my passion but it is also my purpose. So, why was I not brave enough to do what I love? The answer was simple I was fearful of the opinions of others. Many times I have heard people say writing is not a real job. And I somewhat allowed this statement to resonate in my mind, playing over and over again like a scratched record.  

However, I fail to understand that the words we believe about our self shape our reality. The reality for me is, I am not a 9 to 5 Monday through Friday person. I am a creative soul who needs freedom, variety and flexibility. I understand I have to embrace my eccentricity. I can no longer reject pieces of myself to keep a mediocre life. I made the decision to put on my cape of bravery and pursue what I love.

The greatest lesson I am learning on this journey is no one will give you opportunities you have to be brave enough to create your own. And you have to believe in your greatness no matter how many opinions are stacked against you. In order to soar with eagles you have to be brave enough to leave the nest.

So, what you need to do to get out your own way, invest in your greatness and make the decision to be brave?

Being boring is a choice and being brave is an adventure choose wisely!

Picture Reference: Google Image Search

June Theme: Be Bold. Be Brave. Be Brilliant.

The kids are beginning to get out of school and the smell of summer is right around the corner. As we invite the joys of summer we also welcome our series for this month. Our June series is entitled Be Bold. Be Brave. Be Brilliant. In this series we will talk about how being brave can help you live the life you always dreamed of. We will discuss what it takes to be bold and let go of anything that weigh you down. And last but not least will talk about the importance of recognizing your brilliance and using it to create the life you desire.

Dreams Are Meant To Be Lived Out Loud!

Dreams can sometimes be dreams if we never dare to make them an oblique reality. We can talk about what we desire to do but if there is never an action then it becomes words filled with hot air. I often believe people I truly scared to live life fearlessly because what they dream might really come true. I realized for myself the act of thinking bigger and dreaming bigger is motivated by putting action forth and making the dream patterns in my mental thoughts a tangible reality. 

Dreams are only tangible when you can actually see the manifestation of you working hard to make them visible. I can honestly say I am a dreamer and dream to produce many things in my life but last year I wanted to take more time to invest in my dreams. In 2013, I was struck with the reality of realizing how much I do not invest in my gift of writing. I decided to spend time researching writing workshops to take my writing to another dimension. While I spent time researching an “aha” moment hit me, I always wanted to write, live and move to Paris so I needed to attend a writing workshop in Paris. I was excited, motivated and inspired to live my dream to write in Paris. 

I have such a love affair with Paris, I am truly in love with the city of lights. As I began my research I stumbled across different websites but one website intrigued me, Paris Café Writing. Paris Café Writing is a week long workshop conducted by Patricia Tennison. Mrs. Tennison is a renown author, college professor and  writer of the Chicago Tribune. I called Patricia to ask a couple of questions about the workshop after the phone call I decided  to put both of my passions together; my love for writing and my love for Paris. I was going to spend a week in Paris to write.
I am excited about the progression of my decision to move forward with pursuing my dream. This summer I will be attending one of her summer workshops during the week of my 35th birthday to write, to muse and to immerse myself in Paris. Paris has been a long life dream for me and now with courage I am pursuing my heart’s desire. In life we often get stuck because we allow fear to hold us back. 

Fear held me captive for several years after my two year old daughter died. Today marks seven years since she left this Earth but the joy in this story is that it changed me to become an authentic woman. I have experienced many things in my life but learning to live life without limits has been my defining moment. So, as I venture off to Paris this summer I challenge you to not only think big or dream big but to make your dreams a reality. Dreams are meant be lived out loud so what are you waiting for….

Dive Into The Unknown!

I woke up with a deep inclination with the thought of no longer doing something I don’t love because it was time to pursue what I really loved. I did not want to continue wasting time  working on a job that did not give me fulfillment. I wanted to break the shell to live beyond the line of mediocre. I knew it was time to let go of the things that made me miserable and gravitate to the things that fulfilled me. The one thing I knew I had to let go was my job. Some people wake up to go to work others wake up to go to their career and some simply wake up to go to life. When I say that some people wake up to go to life I simply mean that some people no longer live in the box of mediocrity but they are living the life they desire because they possess the faith and courage to pursue their dreams. However, it is bigger than pursuing your dreams; pursuing life wholeheartedly without limitations is brave. Many people live in a fish bowl hoping something or someone can save them from their misery. In reality, we have the power to save ourselves by taking back our life. I believe I am in a season where I have decided to take back my life. If I want to take back my life I have to be bold enough to create the life I desire. The first thing I realized I had to do was exchange my spoken words with action.

Many of us constantly say what we will do but never apply the action. Action is a key ingredient to taking back your life so you can live a life of fulfillment. I know I cannot spend another day, hour or moment not doing what I love because it is slowly taking bits and pieces away from my energy. I need the energy to do what is sufficient to me. It is important to be wise in the things you put your energy into in life. We constantly waste our energies on unproductive factors that lead us to dead ends where we have to back track to our first love, vision or dream. Some of us are in the middle of pursuing the dream, the vision working a 9 to 5 to transition to our ultimate goal. No matter where you maybe in the pursuit of life you have to be willing to dismiss the fear factor and dive into the unknown. The unknown exist outside of your comfort zone. The unknown is a place where you no longer feel comfortable but a bit uneasy. However, it is through our uneasiness where we begin to pierce through the balloon of our best life. Situations that challenge us have the distinct power to change us for the better.  If you are willing to be uncomfortable then you are ready to live life. Life can only be lived if your ready to explore unfamiliar places. The hidden places are the places that will bring a sense of contentment and joy. I challenge you not to waste anymore time feeling comfortable where your happiness is withering away but to break the shell, dive into the unknown. The unknown will be the beginning of starting the best life you could ever imagine. Launch out into the unknown!

 

My Year of Jubilee, My Year of Celebrating Me!

 
I decided to take a whole year from October 1st 2013 to Oct 1st 2014 to focus on celebrating myself holistically. I realize as women we do not celebrate our accomplishments enough while we cater to so many other people we have to choose to cater to ourselves. I believe we lose sight of who we are because we put ourselves on the backburner supporting everyone else dreams. In this year I will celebrate who I am to the fullest. I am honored and excited to be in the November 2013 issue of Essence Magazine on pg. 14 defining my thoughts on black beauty. Get your copy today!
 
 


It’s Okay To Try Something New!

When new ideas, concepts, thoughts and creativity come knock on your door you have to be brave enough to embrace “that something new”….~Stylicia~ 


The world around us is full of new things but yet we stick with what has become familiar; our home, friends and family is all familiar. Sometimes we are scared to embrace something new. Newness has its own mystery and self discovery for a person to immerse themselves into wholeheartedly. Today I read a news story on Dwayne Michael Carter, Jr aka Lil’ Wayne who was deciding to retire from his rapping career. He has become well known for his savvy business skills as a business mogul. He has successfully discovered new rappers such as Drake, Tyga and Nicki Minja. He explained in the article how he has been rapping for 22yrs. If you are thinking what I am thinking this is a very long time to be committed to a talent without exploring other things. He also stated in the article once he is committed to something he is committed to it wholeheartedly (100%).  This statement is a reminder for me to never be so committed to something that I cannot break the commitment to do something else. Sometimes certain commitments are worth breaking when you no longer have a zeal to do them anymore. I think about my own life how I have been writing since I was 8yrs old and have committed myself to be the best writer possible. I was committed to being a great poet but I realize I was neglecting other avenues of my gift. I was more than just a poet spitting poems on the stage I was a writer who wanted to see my articles in every well known magazine and newspaper. Its funny, writing college papers has perfected my skills in writing and challenged me to be a better writer. I would get frustrated writing papers in college on subjects that were completely boring. However, in the end it motivated me to do research to bring out a masterpiece paper. I knew in my heart it was time for me to branch out in different avenues other than poetry. I was getting tired of the traveling, not getting paid what I was worth and no one really appreciating my gift. But the epiphany came where I understood I had to appreciate my writing gift enough not to put it in a box. The truth is I have really started to enjoy blogging because it is my own space to write letters of inspiration to myself. When I started blogging two years ago I had no idea where this blog would go but God gave me ideas little by little. The blog started to evolve into my life journey of becoming a woman and becoming authentic. It was a slow process but near the beginning of this year my blogging journey took flight. Even when the blogging fever ends then I will be challenged to explore other new avenues in my writing. Timing is everything when it comes to trying something new in your life. I believe when that clock of dissatisfaction starts to creep in with one thing then its time to start fresh with something else. When the excitement is gone and there is no more butterflies something new may be creeping in your heart. If you have no passion for it anymore then maybe the passion is meant for something else. Overall, do not be fearful to spread your wings to try something new. I believe it is a brave thing to step out embrace the adrenaline rush of trying something new. Go ahead, it’s okay to try something new!