Treat Yourself Like Royalty

Listen to podcast episode here: https://tinyurl.com/nhatzhmy

Before you can understand how beautiful, complex and intricate you are first you have to break open all those lies you have believed about yourself.

When was the last time you believed positive things about yourself and had someone affirm those positive things?

Lately, I have been reflecting on the painful words people spoke about me. And the saddest part is I started to believe the lies about how other people saw me. I began to see myself in the image of others’ opinions, manipulative comments, and misconceptions.

However, I realized it was generating self-hate. I began to believe that I was not enough or not worthy of good things. I was starting to settle for friendships, relationships, and living a life beneath my standards.

Recently, I had an epiphany about how I was not seeing myself in a clear light, the way God saw me, and the person I am. I knew it was time to let go of the lies, toxic thoughts, and self-hate. Before starting this royal process, I knew digging up unhealthy beliefs was the first step to seeing my royal image.

Before starting your royal journey, here are a few things to start your process.

1. Write a list of ten negative things people have said about you and circle all the ones you start to believe about yourself.
2. Now make a list of ten good things you think about yourself.
3. Ask this question: Are the adverse/toxic people still in your life who said negative things? If so, then why are they in your life? (journal your answer)
4. Another question: How can you disconnect from people who make you feel bad about yourself? (journal your answer)
5. Ways you can rebuild your self-confidence/self-esteem & self-image:

• Therapy 
• Personal Development (books, find supportive communities, join memberships/clubs that foster your enjoyment & passions)
• Get a life coach
• Prayer/Meditation

Letting go of that, “I Am Not Enough”…ish

Access this podcast episode here: https://youtu.be/U7iAi_LDyHs

What do you currently believe about yourself and who you are in this moment? Do you feel like you are lacking in some areas when it comes to your personality?

If you answered YES to any of the above questions, don’t feel ashamed, I think we all believed in the lie of not being enough. The plague of not feeling enough has haunted me throughout my life. I would constantly recycle negative self-talk, abusive words from others, and societal standards. However, as I began to uncover this faulty belief system about myself, I realize the root of it all stemmed from low self-esteem, low self-confidence, and other underlining issues.

In 2011, I went on an inner journey of self-exploration and self-discovery to confront dysfunctional beliefs about myself and my life. And what I found was a wounded young lady who needed to know that her past didn’t define her worth. It has been ten years since the journey has helped me evolve into a confident, self-assured woman where the notion of not being enough is no longer a part of my storyline. 

The truth is that we all are enough in this world, and when we start believing in this idea, we can live a more fulfilled life. When you accept the idea that you lack something within, you run the risk of living a suppressed life. With a suppress mindset, we eventually generate the chase concept; you will chase people, dreams, goals, money, success, etc. to feel accepted and validated by external forces.

When you begin to know who you are and your worth, you become a threat to those who lavish in their insecurities. You must confront your insecurities every day (because it is a daily thing). And to be clear, it is okay to have insecurities because they make us imperfect and vulnerable. Insecurities become ugly when we lash out or use hurtful words against others.

Below are three ways you can say bye bye to the belief of not enough.

• Let Go. Say Au revoir to anybody or anything that make you feel like you are too much.
• Dig Deep. Uncover all the crazy beliefs that has hindered your self-worth story.
• Heal. Allow yourself a time to heal from the past of unforgiveness (forgive yourself), trauma and anything that has kept you hostage to the lie of not being enough .

The Beauty of Being Yourself

In 2003, I looked in the mirror and realized I didn’t like myself. I had to confront the fact that who I was pretending to be was making others happy but making me feel unhappy. My world was falling apart because I was collapsing on the inside. I had no clue to who I was because I spent too much time running from myself. If you ever felt like this it is time to face the inner turmoil and heal.

As an ex-people pleaser, I realize how saying yes was my favorite addiction. It was hard for me to say no to people because I desired to make other people like me. However, I realize making others happy cost me a peace of mind. It takes courage to step out of the crowd and be different. Our differences are what make us beautiful, flaws, and all.

Here is the link to listen to this episode on The Inspirational Corner Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WowJvLuKyuI

 

 

The End of An Era……

Wow, I can’t believe next week Sunday is my birthday. My 30’s journey has been a beautiful evolution of “self”. I have been able to spend the years of my thirties facing issues of my past, closing the door to my past, making intentional changes to my life and most of all becoming the woman I desire to be.

As a single mom I have endured many hardships and personal setbacks but my 30’s have been my years of reflection, refreshing, starting over again and creating the life I desire.

I have become comfortable in my own skin. I love the woman I have evolved into at this point in my life. However, I know the journey is a continuous process. I am excited about my future ahead.

Since, I am commemorating the last year of my 30’s, I am sharing 39 lessons with you I learned during my 30’s journey.

Here are the 39 lessons I learned in my 30’s:
1. Confidence. Confidence is something that starts within & it is something you work on everyday.
2. No validation needed. You are grown,stop asking for permission.
3. No is a complete sentence. Stop explaining yourself.
4. Mind your own business. It never matters what others are doing. Stay focused on your life.
5. No deprivation. Stop depriving yourself of the things you love & desire.
6. Know Your Worth. You have to know your worth to know what you deserve then you will stop giving discounts to people who undermine your quality.
7. Self-care is important. Self-care is about preservation. You have to put it into practice for all areas of your life (mental, emotional, financial, physical & spiritual).
8. Trust God. 
9. Get out your own way.
10. Ask for help.
11. Be gentle with yourself you are doing the best you can.
12. Stop procrastinating.
13. Do it afraid.
14. Get out your comfort zone.
15. Be your own best friend.
16. Speak up. You have a voice use it.
17. Stop chasing. You don’t have to chase a man, friends, people or dreams. All the things meant for you will come at the right time.
18. Travel somewhere new. 
19. Date yourself.
20. Believe in yourself.
21. Do what is best for you.
22. Be unapologetic about your greatness.
22. Set boundaries.
23. Spend time with those that celebrate you not tolerate you.
24. Celebrate yourself.
25. Be patience.
26. Saunter through life.
27. Let things flow.
28. Detach yourself from the outcome.
29. Stop the comparison. When you learn to value your life you will feel no need to compare your life to others.
30. Have faith.
31. Smile often, Laugh more.
32. Have fun. Include more bliss, pleasure & enjoyment in your life.
33. Be ok with not being ok.
34. Be vulnerable.
35. Live life. Don’t just exist live your life alive.
36. Reinvent yourself.
37. Reflect.
38. Pursue your dreams. No matter how old you are you can always pursue the things you desire.
39. Be limitless. Don’t put limitations on your life.

A Seat At The Table…

In a world full of people pleasers it is refreshing to be yourself. When you choose to be yourself magic happens in your life. You no longer settle for mediocrity but you embrace the extraordinary. It will ignite a spark in you to do life in a different way.

Fireworks are created when you no longer follow the crowd but decide to become the life of your own party. When you choose to walk in your power everyone will not accept you. However, learning to be you bravely takes courage.

In this journey you will understand that everyone will not get an invitation to the party of your life. The people you use to entertain will no longer get a seat to the table. You will  gravitate towards people who empower, inspire and encourage you. They will be the ones who become your tribe because you deserve a life filled with those celebrating your existence.

So, today I encourage you to reevaluate the people you have seating at the table of your life. Ask yourself this, “Is this person celebrating me or tolerating me?” You deserve the support, love and joy you give freely to everyone else.

 

Would love to hear your thoughts so chime in below!

 

5 Reasons Why You Are Settling!

I believe there has been times in your life where you settled for less. Settling in any area of your life can be detrimental to your growth. Settling is synonymous to mediocrity and will keep you in a state of stagnancy.

When you begin to gain clarity in your life you will begin to raise the bar. But first it is important that you become  aware of why you have settled for less. Below are five reasons to help you understand why you are settling for less in your life .

1) Fear. Many times we settle for less because of fear. We fear the unknown so we choose to stay in our comfort zone. However, nothing extraordinary ever grows from a comfort zone. So, it is important to let the fear go and launch out into the unknown. Life happens outside your comfort zone.

2) Uncertainty. Another reason we settle for less than we deserve is because we are unsure about what we want. If you are struggling with knowing what you want in your life it may be time to explore life. Exploring life will help you discover the things you may want in your life. When you go through a period of self-discovery it will expose you to the world. Each life experience we help you gain clarity on the  life you truly want to live.

3) Impatience. When you are impatient it can make you miss out on your greatest life. Many people settle for less because they are too impatient to wait for what they really want in life. When you wait patiently for what you really want you alleviate  unnecessary stress. So, wait patiently for what you want!

4) Not Knowing Your Worth. If you do not know your worth you will settle for the wrong things. If you do not spend time to build your self-worth, self-love, self-confidence and self-esteem you will discount your worth. I have learned in my life that people will treat you how you treat yourself. It is important to nurture love and confidence within yourself so you can recognize your worth.

5) Mediocrity. The last reason we settle in life because we become okay with mediocrity. We become comfortable with just existing instead of living a life to our fullest potential. Mediocrity keeps you stagnant and it creates procrastination.  You will never be fulfilled with a mediocre life. So, let go of mediocrity so you can grab hold to an extraordinary life.

Action Tip: This week take some time to focus on how you can stop settling in your life by putting one of the five reasons into practice.

In the comments below share with me the reasons you have settled for less in your life. 

Cultivating A Sacred Space….

During this summer, I had time to press pause and learn to create a sacred space  for myself. In my 60 day journey I became aware of my depletion because  I was giving to others on an empty tank.  I felt like I was not enough or what I was doing was not enough. In a society where we pour out so much of our energy to our jobs, family and friends we have to create time to replenish ourselves.

In my  search for a better solution I was hit with the idea that who I am is enough. I had to give up the need for validation from outside sources. In reality, God was the only approving source I needed to accomplish everything in my life. He already approved of me so I no longer needed to ask for permission to be the woman I was meant to be.

I realized I needed to cultivate a sacred space to allow myself to be me. I had to let go of my self-sabotaging nature and embrace my freedom. When I searched for  clarity I knew I was the one getting in my own way. I had to reclaim my time, walk into my freedom and protect my space. This was the ultimate shift I needed in my life to receive all the  great things I deserved.

So, below I have three tips that can help you cultivate a sacred space to up level in your life.

1) Reclaim Your Time. In order  for you to gain clarity you have to stop what you are doing and make a u-turn. Go back to a point in your life where you felt fulfilled and then reassess what made you feel this way. Now think of a time in your life where you began to feel unfulfilled and you felt depleted. Think about what you were doing to create these feelings of emptiness. Reclaiming your time is about going back and pinpointing the day or moment you began to lose pieces of yourself.

2) Protect Your Space. You do not need to create a PSA for everyone to know every detail happening in your life. The greatest thing to do is be silent and figure out what is really meant for you to keep secrete. I am learning everything I endure is not always meant for me to share.

I find joy in creating special moments for myself without documenting them or discussing them with friends and family. This will help you keep intimate thoughts and moments to yourself. Another suggestion is buy a journal to release your thoughts, whether good or bad there will be no judgment because you have left your thoughts on paper.

3) Walk into your freedom. The greatest way to be free is to already know you are free. Create a time & space for yourself where you are free to do what you want without any other obligations.

Picking up a hobby that is fun will give you the freedom to focus on time just for you. It will allow you to create a space to let go and dive into your creativity.

How can you create a sacred space to regain your power back? And which tip will you work on this week.

Share your thoughts below in the comment section!

 

June Theme: Be Bold. Be Brave. Be Brilliant.

The kids are beginning to get out of school and the smell of summer is right around the corner. As we invite the joys of summer we also welcome our series for this month. Our June series is entitled Be Bold. Be Brave. Be Brilliant. In this series we will talk about how being brave can help you live the life you always dreamed of. We will discuss what it takes to be bold and let go of anything that weigh you down. And last but not least will talk about the importance of recognizing your brilliance and using it to create the life you desire.

Age Ain’t Nothing But A Number!

Age is not a deadline it is the beginning of a new era! ~Stylicia~

It is funny how we live in a world that gives us a particular age limit to have kids, get married and all the other superfluous stuff. However, I believe putting limits on yourself due to your age can literally handicap your future. I do understand age is important when it comes to the regular things such as driving, drinking and understanding the fundamentals of life. However, we should not put an age on our dreams, success or living the life we desire.

I remember when I told God if I am not married and have another child by 35 then it was a wrap for me. Now at 36 going on 37 I laugh at my ultimatum that I gave God. I realize there is beauty in embracing every stage of your life at every age. I am not married at this point in my life and I definitely don’t desire another child. I never knew that my 30’s was a time for me to explore my authenticity, heal from my past and embrace newness. We live in a society that can sometimes be caught up in the numbers but as we progress America is realizing age is simply a number!

After 36 years of living I realize I can be who I want to be and I can do what I want to do at any age. The only thing that will limit me is my mindset. You can get married at 50, have kids at 42 or go back to school at 60. Age is not the determining factor in your life from succeeding…..your mindset is! When you put a deadline on how much you can accomplish due to your age then you limit your potential. We all have the potential to be great but some of us choose to wait until a certain time to achieve the things we want to do.

Have you ever thought about retiring at 30, 40 or even 50, if so what is stopping you? Absolutely nothing! It is time to get rid of the deadline in your head and start living again, start dreaming and pursuing the life you desire. Yes, it’s true with age comes responsibility and wisdom but also with age comes grace to appreciate life a lot more. I can attest to this because the older I get the more I appreciate life and all it has to offer. If you started to put deadlines in your head I want you to take a step back and erase those pesky things. Watch and see how amazing your life can be if you start to embrace the moment at any age because in reality age ain’t nothing but a number!

Recap August Blog Post

As the month of August take a final bow this week we are gearing up for our September series but before we do that we want to recap this month’s series. Our series for this month was entitled signed sealed & delivered. We discuss the importance of self validation, committing to yourself & believing in yourself. In order for us to be great we have to look deep inside to pull out the best version of who we are meant to be. Below are the links to check out what you missed for the month of August.

Commit To Yourself:

http://www.theinspirationalcorner.net/2015/08/commit-to-yourself.html 

Validate Yourself

http://www.theinspirationalcorner.net/2015/08/validate-yourself.html 

Believe In Yourself!

http://www.theinspirationalcorner.net/2015/08/believe-in-yourself.html