Disappointments Can Lead To Adventure….

Have you ever been disappointed or felt like what you desired and what you got were out of sync? 

I am sure we all have faced the reality of disappointment at one time or another in our lives. We may have been disappointed by the people, places, and expectations we set for our lives. However, I have realized that disappointments are a part of life, and instead of allowing them to make me bitter, angry, or fear the unknown, I have the power to let the disappointments of life lead me to the life of my dreams.

Disappointment has been a big part of my life. It started when I decided to leave home and venture into adulthood. My first encounter with disappointment started in my 20s with romantic relationships and friendships. I desperately wanted a man to love, appreciate and find me worthy, but I didn’t realize this experience was a massive disappointment because I didn’t require this of myself. Then the next uncomfortable moment of my life was learning the art of female friendships. I was tired of insecure women trying to compete; instead, I desired friends who wanted to celebrate, encourage and collaborate. However, when I started to set boundaries and work on my self-worth, I knew it was bringing me closer to my authenticity.

The most challenging chapter of disappointment I endured was when my two-year-old daughter died. I stopped believing in life’s whimsical, romantic things and allowed bitterness to create a prison of fear and hopelessness. But after all I endured, I had the right to feel disappointed by people, society, and everything at that time. 

So you may wonder, what did I do to let disappointment become a motivation to help me embrace a life of adventure? 

I decided to let it help me identify things I didn’t want in my life and start spending more time focusing on what I wanted in my life and making a plan to pursue those desires. I believe we spend so much time on our disappointments, creating stagnancy and hopelessness. As adults, we lose our childlike imagination and joy of living life whimsically. You have the creative ability to let every disappointment lead you to the adventure your life deserves.

7 Ways To Relax, Relate & Release During The Holiday Season

Access this podcast here: https://tinyurl.com/75avbdjn

The holiday season is a time of slowing down, resting & enjoying the present moment. However, the holidays are filled with dread for some because of the need to be a part of the holiday rush.

The holiday rush mentality is filled with the urge to be in the hustle and bustle; however, what if you adopt a new mindset of relaxing, relating & releasing your stress into the atmosphere.

Here are seven ways to relax under the holiday stress, relate to the emotions you feel & release them with ease.

1. Journal the stress, doubts & anxiety away.
   My journal has become my therapist because I can express my concerns without judgment & organize my thoughts. Overall, journaling your thoughts can be therapeutic.
2. Ask yourself the critical questions.
   Sometimes we can overthink ourselves into a frenzy, so realizing what is really important helps you get insight into the bigger picture.
3. Do What Makes You Happy.
   What is logical to someone else may not work for you, so finding your balance is essential. Happiness is an inside job, so make sure you do the inner work to create your own place of joy.
4. Let go of the knowing.
   We are curious human beings with a desire to know everything. But when you let go of control, you create a space for the unknown adventures to come to fruition.
5. Make space for self-compassion.
   Sometimes we can be our worst critics, but taking time to create a space of grace for yourself will take the pressure off & eliminate the need to overextend yourself.
6. Boundaries are boundless.
   There are no limits to the boundaries you need to make to keep your mental, emotional & spiritual well-being secure.
7. Support systems save lives.
   Creating a healthy support system of family & friends will relieve some of the daily life pressures. Remember, no man can be an island & thrive by themselves. ReplyForward

The Truth About Living An Unapologetic Life

Access this podcast episode here: https://tinyurl.com/5azn2m8

It’s your road, and yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you. ~Rumi~

What does it mean to live an unapologetic life?

According to Webster’s dictionary, unapologetic is defined as an innate term of not acknowledging or expressing regret. However, I define the term unapologetic as living a life designed for your own gain & enjoyment.

As you begin your journey of living an unconventional life, everyone may not understand or support your decisions but believing in yourself is vital. The key blueprint of living an unapologetic life is embodied in having faith in your dreams, producing intentional steps to achieve each goal, and knowing everything will work in your favor, even the negative moments.

Overall, true freedom is when you no longer justify the way you live, embrace your life in the present moment, and build a life you are proud of. You are the interior designer of your life, and everyone else’s opinion should never matter as you produce your masterpiece.   

Below are four key components and questions to start your journey on living your life unapologetically.

1. Values: Define what you value by asking yourself what do I value?
2. Beliefs: What do you believe about yourself & your dreams?
3. Desires: Do you know what you really want to do?/What do you desire in your life?
4. Priorities/Goals: What is really important to you?/What are your life goals?

Be Okay With Uncertainty…

Access podcast episode here: https://tinyurl.com/yu9ufz57

The beauty about uncertainty is no matter how well we plan, there will always be question marks on how the journey will unfold. Sometimes we allow the fear of the unknown to keep us from pursuing our dreams and the life we constantly desired to live. However, if we focus on the journey instead of the destination, we will realize that embracing the hidden parts will help us accept life’s adventures.

Currently, I am going through an unfamiliar phase in my life, and it has taught me how to embrace the unknown. Sometimes we feel as if we need to know how everything will turn out, but in reality, we have no idea how life will unfold.

As I go through this new normal many emotions, appear from happiness, fear, excitement, and anxiety. However, I am enjoying this unpredictable place because it has given me confidence, courage, and resilience to move forward. I am self-assured that the answers will come, and everything will fall into place.

I have learn no matter how many plans you make, life will teach you how to be flexible. The flexibility provides an atmosphere of freedom but it can make you feel powerless. We fear the unknown because it forces us out of our comfort zone. And significant changes happen when we are in unfamiliar territory. When you can embrace the uncertainty, then you will encounter countless adventures in your life. 

Here are three ways to embrace uncertainty:

1. Make plans but be flexible. 

2. Let go of the need to have all the answers. Life is an adventure when you are open to the flow & knowing everything will work out.

3. Don’t settle. A lot of people settle for the familiar because they are not willing to be uncomfortable. However, if you desire to live your dream life taking risk are a prerequisite.

Do Less, Live More

You can listen to the podcast here: https://youtu.be/tRYKkyFw7vI

The summer solstice is a beautiful time to recalibrate your life slowly. Instead of rushing through each day, summer is a reminder to slow down and revel in the moments. We are shifting into longer days and better weather to enjoy. However, to enjoy this summer, reprioritizing your schedule for rest, relaxation, and fun is vital.

After spending a year in quarantine during the pandemic, everyone is ready to get back to traveling, connecting with family, and enjoying life. Now is the time to implement a life of doing less and living more. I genuinely believe summer is the beginning of us tapping into an energy of “just being” mode. I am going to be intentional about managing my time for rest, fun and enjoyment this summer. Many times I would find myself doing instead of being in the present moment. This summer I will travel less, write more & explore unknown territory.

Summertime can become a time to fall in love with living life in an abundant way, however giving up the daily rat race will be required in order to connect to the present moment. When we began to fall in love with our life every moment will be pleasurable. Summer is a season where we can leave the stress behind and dive into the pleasures of living our best life.

Below are a few ways you can begin to implement the concept of doing less and living more in your everyday life.

• Let go of the stress. Let go of what you can’t control, embrace where you are now & create a solution list.
• Prioritize Fun. We often schedule things we have to do in our calendar but rarely schedule in fun. Make a weekly goal to schedule something fun to do in your calendar this summer.
• Balance Your Work & Personal Life. When you set boundaries you can create a balance between your work & personal life. (Ex: Be consistent about getting off of work at a specific time to enjoy yourself, family & friends. Don’t be scared to say NO to working overtime).

The Travel Series: Work to Live or Live to Work?!? (Part 2)

Listen here to this podcast episode: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cmrLU6joNuU

I recently got a chance to watch the new Netflix series, Emily in Paris, which transports me back to the time I lived abroad. Living abroad shift my perspective on the work-life balance. When I was living in Iceland and Italy, I was always aware of the importance of living in the moment. International living helps me grasp the difference between American and European culture.

In America, we live to work because our life rotates around the demands of work. This lifestyle encourages long working hours, making more money, neglecting family and friends, and taking fewer vacations. People who choose to live to work rarely take breaks to enjoy life but escape a life they hate. The feelings of low self-worth, needing validation, and other internal insecurities often plague their lives. Workaholism is the number one addiction in this live to work culture. 

However, European culture promotes a work to live culture. This lifestyle encourages working fewer hours to enjoy a quality of life, making less money to live a specific lifestyle, and utilizing vacation for a time of leisure. People who choose this type of living are happier, productive, and excel in their personal and professional lives because they spend more time enhancing their creative nature.

A work to live mindset has significant benefits than a live to work philosophy if you notice people live longer in other countries versus the U.S. because they promote the importance of a healthy work-life balance.

And so I want to give you a few tips on how to begin your work to live lifestyle.

1. Prioritize your most important task you need to complete. Figure out the top three things you have to finish at your job so you will not spend time working overtime.
2. Use your vacation time. Don’t let your vacation time build up instead be proactive by planning your vacation at the beginning of the year.
3. Plan your exit strategy. If you are working a job that does not promote your ideal lifestyle start looking for different alternatives.

Pursuing Your Dream

 

How many times have you looked at your life and realize you are not living the life you desire? Did someone tell you that your dream was unattainable? Or did you let society dictate to you what was more important in your life?

When we are children, we believe we can be anything we desire to be in life. No matter how ridiculous our dreams may seem, as a child, we believe in our thoughts. As we shift into the teenage years, we start to let society dictate to us which journey will be profitable. We begin to focus on reality instead of the desire of our dreams.

The child inside of us starts to disappear because reality becomes more important than our childhood dreams. Our lives no longer hold enthusiasm or passion; instead, our adulthood has made us apathetic. We begin to forget about the vision we had to live a life full of wonder, passion, and excitement. Our dreams have become faint whispers needing a fresh breath. What can we do to resuscitate our passion for pursuing our dreams?

• The first step to pursuing your dream is to reconnect with your childhood dreams. When I was young, I enjoyed writing, and I remember my Uncle Dave would always tell me I was going to be a famous writer. I remember in 2003 while living in Sicily, my love for writing reignited when I read Maya Angelou’s poem “Phenomenal Woman” for open mic night. Four years later, I published my first poetry book. The little girl on the inside of me reconnected back with my lifelong dream to become a writer. It was up to me to answer the call!
• The second step is to write a list of the the things that stopped you from pursuing your dreams. After you recognize the roadblocks begin to write a list of possibilities of following your dreams. (For example: Roadblock: I stopped pursuing my dream of painting because I didn’t think I was a great artist. Possibility: I can start taking art classes at a local gallery to brush up on my artistic skills.)
• The last step is to surround yourself around people who are living your dream. When you surround yourself around like-minded people you are building a community of support. When you have a support system it fosters a life filled with enjoyment, creativity and success.

So pursue the life you desire instead of burying your dreams. Dreams are meant to be lived out loud!!!

3 ways To Create A Memorable Summer!

 

With summer coming many people are excited about vacation and spending time with their family. However, I am passionate about creating memorable moments with my daughter. Although I am going to visit my family, I have decided to shorten my trip and plan smaller trips throughout the summer for my daughter and me to enjoy. It is so easy to get caught up in focusing on visiting so many people during your time off, however, what is more, important you planning trips that make you happy this summer even if it means disappointing others. Vacation is about unplugging from your routine and creating memories that will last a lifetime.

My main focus this summer will be unplugging from social media, reading books I love and being present in the moment. We can produce the most fabulous things when we focus on the present moment.

Below are three ways to create a memorable summer:

1. Unplug. The present moment is the most important moment in our lives. This summer take the time to take a break from social media and savor the memories.

2. Do what makes your soul happy. Too often we spend endless summers traveling to see family but have not schedule time to do what we desire. Make sure you schedule a personal trip in for yourself this summer, you deserve it!

3.  Create Memories That Last For A Lifetime. Spend this summer exploring new places and spaces to produce memories that will last forever. The goal is to spend money on experiences not things.

So, I challenge you this summer to do what makes you happy, focus on the present moment and create memories that will last forever!

Why road trips are great for writers….

Imagine an open road filled with many destinations but there is no specific direction you want to take. Each road leads to an adventure where stories start to ruminate in your mind. The people you meet, the places you see and the things you do are all connected to a bigger picture. The bigger picture is the stories waiting to come alive. Road trips have the power to bridge the gap between creativity and inspiration.

I believe road trips are essential for a writer. Writers not only need time to write but they need a place of inspiration. Sometimes the best inspiration happens when you are living life. Last month, I decided to embark on an epic road trip with my daughter and best friend. It had been nine years since I went on an extended road trip. I was determined not to drive twelve hours to my hometown.

However, in the end trying to fight the inevitable was useless so I let go, let God  and the road trip came to fruition.  As I reflect on all that took place on our road trip I realize how important it was for me to get outside my comfort zone. The trip was epic and fun.

Road trips are a great way to explore different cities, meet interesting people and reconnect with friends and family.  As a writer road trips help us reconnect with our five senses, live in the moment and gain clarity. Below are three reasons why road trips are great for writers.

1. You tap into your five senses. There is a great power when you tap into your five senses: sight, sound, taste, smell and touch play a major part in developing characters and the setting of the story. Road trips force us to pay attention to unfamiliar surroundings.

2. New Places & Faces. Road trips allow you to meet interesting people and explore new places. These two elements can help a writer develop characters and incorporate the place they visit into their story. Each person you meet may have a distinct personality trait you want to integrate into your character’s development.

3. Gain Clarity. Every writer needs time away to unplug and refresh their thoughts. Road trips help you relax, rejuvenate and reboot your thinking. When you take time to clear your mind your thoughts become organized. You will be able to come back to a writing project with a new perspective.

 

 

 

The End of An Era……

Wow, I can’t believe next week Sunday is my birthday. My 30’s journey has been a beautiful evolution of “self”. I have been able to spend the years of my thirties facing issues of my past, closing the door to my past, making intentional changes to my life and most of all becoming the woman I desire to be.

As a single mom I have endured many hardships and personal setbacks but my 30’s have been my years of reflection, refreshing, starting over again and creating the life I desire.

I have become comfortable in my own skin. I love the woman I have evolved into at this point in my life. However, I know the journey is a continuous process. I am excited about my future ahead.

Since, I am commemorating the last year of my 30’s, I am sharing 39 lessons with you I learned during my 30’s journey.

Here are the 39 lessons I learned in my 30’s:
1. Confidence. Confidence is something that starts within & it is something you work on everyday.
2. No validation needed. You are grown,stop asking for permission.
3. No is a complete sentence. Stop explaining yourself.
4. Mind your own business. It never matters what others are doing. Stay focused on your life.
5. No deprivation. Stop depriving yourself of the things you love & desire.
6. Know Your Worth. You have to know your worth to know what you deserve then you will stop giving discounts to people who undermine your quality.
7. Self-care is important. Self-care is about preservation. You have to put it into practice for all areas of your life (mental, emotional, financial, physical & spiritual).
8. Trust God. 
9. Get out your own way.
10. Ask for help.
11. Be gentle with yourself you are doing the best you can.
12. Stop procrastinating.
13. Do it afraid.
14. Get out your comfort zone.
15. Be your own best friend.
16. Speak up. You have a voice use it.
17. Stop chasing. You don’t have to chase a man, friends, people or dreams. All the things meant for you will come at the right time.
18. Travel somewhere new. 
19. Date yourself.
20. Believe in yourself.
21. Do what is best for you.
22. Be unapologetic about your greatness.
22. Set boundaries.
23. Spend time with those that celebrate you not tolerate you.
24. Celebrate yourself.
25. Be patience.
26. Saunter through life.
27. Let things flow.
28. Detach yourself from the outcome.
29. Stop the comparison. When you learn to value your life you will feel no need to compare your life to others.
30. Have faith.
31. Smile often, Laugh more.
32. Have fun. Include more bliss, pleasure & enjoyment in your life.
33. Be ok with not being ok.
34. Be vulnerable.
35. Live life. Don’t just exist live your life alive.
36. Reinvent yourself.
37. Reflect.
38. Pursue your dreams. No matter how old you are you can always pursue the things you desire.
39. Be limitless. Don’t put limitations on your life.